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Come to me

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I am a 3rd year student in a university studying criminal justice and forensics. My dream is to become a profiler and to enter Behavioural Analysis Unit in the CBI department. I still have a long way to go to reach my goal. As part of my education I need to submit a thesis explaining a criminal behaviour. The thesis is simple, there is no right or wrong. We just need to explain what we think of the case, the reason behind the crime and if possible, a few words about the criminal mind if we can crack it. All my friends have picked serial killers and people who murdered more than five. But I still can’t wrap my mind whom to pick for my thesis. 

While I am researching about the criminals a particular case attracted me. Her name is Ria, she killed a man when she was 16 and is now in jail for 5 years. She still got 2 years to finish her sentence. Details about the case are simple. Ria’s mother had her while she was working as a prostitute and she has grown up with her grandmother. Ria’s mother had taken money from loan sharks and fled when she was 10 years old. Since then the loan sharks started harassing Ria and her grandmother. One day Ria stabbed one of the loan sharks and ended up killing him. Case was declared as self-defence and thus she was sentenced for 7 years. Interest spiked in me to know how a little girl who killed a man was doing now and want to know what ran in her mind when she did that.

Everyone around me advised that the case is very clear and there is nothing to analyse. People believed that Ria come from a background where her fate holds her to become a criminal at any cost. But I took the case and did some investigation. I have tried to set up a meeting with Ria but was rejected for more than 10 times. I was told that Ria doesn’t wish to meet anyone but I wrote her a letter saying that I would never ask her any questions unless she would like me to ask and that I only want to hear her out what happened. The next time when I tried to set up the meeting Ria accepted it. I am now heading to meet her. 

I saw her walking towards me, she was so tiny and with her hair loose I can’t see her face well. We sat opposite to each other with a table between us. According to jail rules, we are allowed to hug when the visitors meet inmates and when they bid goodbye. I extended my hand to shake but Ria just took a seat. I introduced myself as Gautham and asked how she is doing. She just nodded her head. I waited for her to talk. 20 minutes passed by and that’s when she asked, why do you want to know about me?’ Gautham: ’Just curious to know how a high school valedictorian has turned into a murderer’ Ria: ‘ok. You can ask me what you want to know’ Gautham: ‘Do you wish to know how your grandmother is? I heard that you didn’t meet her since you are in jail’. Ria face turned red and I could see she is trying to hide her emotions but she didn’t respond. I continued, ‘She is doing well, she is now staying at the state funded old age home.’ She still didn’t respond back. I asked her, ‘Ria, is there anything you need to know about me before we start. I am meeting you to write a thesis for my college report and I would only do that if you consent it’. Ria: ‘I am ok with it and I don’t want to know anything about you.’ I couldn’t continue the conversation as Ria’s face shows that she doesn’t want to talk now. The session has been completed and she walked away.

Next few sessions nothing happened, I just go and sit with Ria, wait for her to talk but she never did, she never even looked into my eyes.

The next session, she still doesnt shake my hand and took the chair. Even today I can’t see her face well due to her loose hair. Gautham: ‘Ria, Can I know what exactly happened?’ Ria: ‘Tell me about your family?’ Gautham: ‘I have a little brother Aki and my parents’. Ria: ‘What would you do if someone is hitting Aki senseless when you just walked into his room’, Gautham:’ I would kill him’, Ria: ’That’s what I did’. I didn’t quite understand what she meant. Ria:’ The day I came home from my graduation I could see him hitting my grandmother senseless asking to payback his money. I tried to stop him but he pushed me away. I tried to search for something to throw on him and found a knife. I couldn’t think anymore and stabbed him till I could see that he can’t move. It looked like everyone around me including the police and my state lawyer expected me to kill someone because I was born in a broken family. I felt that no one would ever listen to me.’ Gautham: ’Is that why you accepted to meet me, because I said I would hear you out.’ She just nodded her head.

I got all the information required from her for my thesis but I still didn’t stop meeting her. One day, I was waiting for her in the visiting area and saw her walking towards me. As usual I extended my hand even though I know she wouldn’t take it. She just walked straight to me and hugged. I didn’t know what happened and I could feel that she is crying. The police guard asked us to move apart. I made her sit and offered her water. She then saw me into my eyes and said Thank you. I didn’t respond. Ria:’ Thanks for what you did to my grandmother. I read her letter that you helped her get her heart surgery and that you have been visiting her often to learn how she is doing. I also know that you have listed your number as emergency contact for me and my grandmother.’ I still didn’t respond. After few minutes of silence, Ria: ‘why did you pick me for your thesis?’ Gautham: ‘Because I want to see your face clearly. I have never seen your face completely. Even your profile picture on the case file is covered with your hair’. 

After the above happened, I couldn’t meet her for 2 weeks as I was busy with my college and Aki was sick as well. After 2 weeks, I went to meet her. I am waiting in the visiting area and saw Ria walking towards me. Her hair was tied back and I could see her face completely. I couldn’t believe my own eyes for what I am seeing. She is the most beautiful person I have ever seen and somehow, I felt that I would fight anyone to keep her protected. When she came near me, I was still staring at her. She then looked in to my eyes asking ‘what now?’. I said: ‘Now let’s practice smile’. She then started smiling and that’s the moment I know that I am never going to leave her.


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